and yesterday, we talked about the tests that you put people through.
it all started 'cause we went to the same restaurant we went to on our first date. so of course we rehashed it. (and talked about how foxy-the-idiotic who picked the place chose to go to a dining establishment where she knew she'd order a pizza no longer on the menu making her look a more than a skosh high maintenance even though it's the best pizza ever and totally worth it and people do it all the time, but this is a run-on parenthetical statement and i should just end it now) and we talked about first dates. and getting to know people. and impressions. and most importantly, tests.
I, for instance, walk so that I can see if the guy is going to make the effort of opening the door for me. And see which doors. Sometimes I even walk a step faster to see if he tries to beat me to it.
A little farther on in a relationship I'll sometimes offer to pay a little earlier that I'd prefer, just to see if he takes me up on it--and how he accepts/deflects. It's just to learn more about him, it's not a deal-breaker. and I wouldn't offer to pay if I didn't have the cash.
I also usually tell a guy about my one of my friend's relationship issues de jour--not disclosing my opinion or anything too personal--to see how he thinks.
just little tests. nothing huge.
but I actually didn't start the test convo--he did. he told me about how sometimes on a first date he'll take the girl somewhere and suggest that they eat ribs for dinner because they're soooo messy, and there's no way to be all prim and proper and tidy when you're eating ribs. it's to see how she deals, and see if she's easy going.
he also informed me that opening the door, a la a bronx tale, (you pull up right where she lives, right? Before you get outta the car, you lock both doors. Then, get outta the car, you walk over to her. You bring her over to the car. Dig out the key, put it in the lock and open the door for her. Then you let her get in. Then you close the door. Then you walk around the back of the car and look through the rear window. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in: dump her...that means she's a selfish broad and all you're seeing is the tip of the iceberg. You dump her and you dump her fast) isn't a test with him. I explained to him that I've done that since I started dating, and that once I saw that movie I knew I prolly couldn't ever stop.
I know I always make a point of making a bad pun if the opportunity presents itself, to see if our senses of humor mesh. and I'm sure there are others that I can't think of right now.
but the eating ribs thing? totally new concept to me. and it makes me curious--what tests do you give? or do your friends give? or have you been put through?
~foxysavant
I, for instance, walk so that I can see if the guy is going to make the effort of opening the door for me. And see which doors. Sometimes I even walk a step faster to see if he tries to beat me to it.
A little farther on in a relationship I'll sometimes offer to pay a little earlier that I'd prefer, just to see if he takes me up on it--and how he accepts/deflects. It's just to learn more about him, it's not a deal-breaker. and I wouldn't offer to pay if I didn't have the cash.
I also usually tell a guy about my one of my friend's relationship issues de jour--not disclosing my opinion or anything too personal--to see how he thinks.
just little tests. nothing huge.
but I actually didn't start the test convo--he did. he told me about how sometimes on a first date he'll take the girl somewhere and suggest that they eat ribs for dinner because they're soooo messy, and there's no way to be all prim and proper and tidy when you're eating ribs. it's to see how she deals, and see if she's easy going.
he also informed me that opening the door, a la a bronx tale, (you pull up right where she lives, right? Before you get outta the car, you lock both doors. Then, get outta the car, you walk over to her. You bring her over to the car. Dig out the key, put it in the lock and open the door for her. Then you let her get in. Then you close the door. Then you walk around the back of the car and look through the rear window. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in: dump her...that means she's a selfish broad and all you're seeing is the tip of the iceberg. You dump her and you dump her fast) isn't a test with him. I explained to him that I've done that since I started dating, and that once I saw that movie I knew I prolly couldn't ever stop.
I know I always make a point of making a bad pun if the opportunity presents itself, to see if our senses of humor mesh. and I'm sure there are others that I can't think of right now.
but the eating ribs thing? totally new concept to me. and it makes me curious--what tests do you give? or do your friends give? or have you been put through?
~foxysavant
4 comments:
I'm pondering this, b/c I think most of my tests are subconcious. I'll be back tomorrow.
The car door test doesn't work if the guy has keyless entry and uses the remote instead of opening the door with a key. I dated a guy once who did not open car doors for women anymore because he used his remote. The test to see if the girl would unlock his door didn't work if it was already unlocked. Apparently with him, oepning the car door was all about the test and not at all about being polite!
I do the same thing you do as far as offering to pay and seeing which door the guy will open. I really can't think of anything else that I do. I'll report back if anything comes to mind.
actually, the guy I'm dating has the remote, but he still opens the door for me.
and though I don't have to unlock his door, I still crack it open for him.
when i was single, i'd test if the guy would open the car door for me. or walk me to my door and wait until i'm inside safely before he goes off. its not deal breakers but significant.
also i'll observe how he treats waitpersons and see if he is polite, respectful.
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